The three most ridiculous hours of my life - full story

NOTE: This post refers to what happened three weeks ago when traveling from Huangshan to Shanghai. I had to travel back 12 hours from Huangshan Mountain to Shanghai. I decided to break up my 12 hour journey from Huangshan to Shanghai by stopping at a small city that was not any kind of tourist destination I wanted to better experience the real China. So at 6pm I stepped off the train into the city of Xuancheng, Anhui province. The city was far less developed than others. There were many non-motorized bike cabs. The main road was under construction. There were no tall buildings. I got off the train and started walking down the street with my huge backpackers backpack on my back. I was like a celeberity. Everyone was staring at me. People would come by on motorcycles, bicycles, or the cabs. Some would want to give me a lift, others asked where I had come from and if I had gotten lost and got off the train by mistake. No one spoke a word of English. I told them that I had wanted to see the city of Xuancheng, so I was just looking around, and would continue on to Shanghai via train later in the night. The one thing I found on the Internet about Xuancheng was that there was an alligator farm in Xuancheng. The farm was also a minor entertainment site where you could sing karaoke and eat alligator meat. I looked up the word for alligator in my dictionary, and asked a bicycle cab driver if he knew where it was, as I made a motion with my hands like an alligator biting. He had no idea what I was talking about. Suddenly though, I was surrounded by about 20 people, peppering me with questions. I tried to ask about the alligator farm, but it was completely unsuccessful. Giving up, I answered questions about my age, where I had come from, why I had come to Xuancheng. There was a really cute little girl who asked me a bunch of questions. Some people were laughing, chatting among themselves, others with just staring silently. The crowd finally began to disperse a bit, and I continued wandering through the town. Finally I settled down at a center square where I ordered some noodles in a streetside restaurant. There were two young men of about 25 sitting near me. We struck up a conversation and passed the dictionary back and forth as needed. They were both air conditioner sales men. As we talked another crowd began to form around me. A bunch of nine year old girls began to play the, "Who's brave enough to ask the foreigner a question game." It was really cute. We chatted for a little bit. I asked them if they liked school ( one of them did, the other didn't) and what they wanted to do when they grew up. I told them that if one day they ever came to America, they should call me up or email me, and I gave them my contact info. I'll be really amused if in 12 years I get an email from one of them. After that several well dressed people my age came around and I bought them some drinks. We chatted for a little bit, and then they asked if I wanted to sing karaoke. Sure, I told them. We got in a cab and began driving around town. "You are our friend," they told me. They asked me my phone number in America so that they could call me if they ever came to America, and I gave it to them. Gradually I noticed that we were on a dark side street. Then we turned down another even darker alley, before emerging in a deserted parking lot in the warehouse district. The cab came to a stop. "Oh f*ck!" I thought to myself. Friend my ass! How did I fall for this! They were all on their cell phones, Who were they calling? Were they calling fellow gang members, saying "Oh we've got a live one here." I began to wonder if I could convince at least not to take my train ticket and luggage, and just take my money. I also took at my own cell phone, and tried to remember the Chinese 911 number (was it 011 or 110???) but then realized I didn't know how to describe my location. I wondered if them seeing the cell phone and threatening to call the police might be enough to scare them. Would the cab driver watch as they mugged me, or would he do anything to stop it? I was terrified. I was in a strange city in China, completely alone, where I could barely speak the language. I had absolutely no recourse, nothing I could do. But then the cab started moviing. We got back on a populated road. They noticed that I was shaking, and they told me, "Don't be afraid! They began trying to convince me that everything was fine, but I told them that I didn't not want to go down anymore dark sidestreets. After a little bit more driving around, we ended up at a karaoke bar. They had been good to their word after all. I started to relax as we went inside. Before I knew it, I was doing a solo rendition of "My Heart Will Go On." A couple slow danced to the song, and at the end there was mild applause and someone brought me some flowers. For the next song I awkwardly ballroom danced with a girl. After the karaoke, we drove around town some more. This time we stopped at a bathhouse. A few minutes later I was stripped naked and soaking in hot water. After the long train ride, it felt amazing. Afterwards, I showered and even was given a throwaway toothbrush to brush my teeth. In the lobby we took some photographs together. At that point I think I accidently asked to be taken back to the train station. I had pulled out my train ticket to double check the departure time, there was a brief exchange in Chinese, and we ended up going back to the train station where they dropped me off. I was a little disapointed I didn't get to go to the disco with them, but it had already been a hell of a night.